Reflections As A Son Graduates

Photos I took of my son’s senior prom with dear friends.

I’m clenching each day in my jaws and shaking loose every ounce of life, savoring every moment, leeching it of presence. Attentive to every emotional nuance, I emblazon sounds and sights on my very soul.

Sleep is of secondary importance. A few nights ago, my three sons and a friend laughed and talked in the kitchen. I settled on a counter top to listen, to soak in their voices. Weary from short nights and busy days, I longed for sleep. But the sands are sifting, and I’m determined to touch every last grain as it slips through my fingers.

That’s how I feel about my son graduating from high school this week.

little jacobThis is a child dearly loved and deeply enjoyed. There is grief with the fading of season, with the launching of his physical presence out beyond our cozy little family; but there is joy in knowing what a gift he will be to that big, wide world out there. There is peace as our friendship expands into discussions of values and how details tuck into what matters most, in watching him choose, in standing on the sidelines and cheering until I’m hoarse, “Yes! I’m so proud of who you are and what you are becoming.”

2015 16In this time of transition, sometimes I cry, sometimes I laugh. I dread a few days from now when he dons that cap and gown, yet lean forward in joyful expectancy as he steps into his dreams for the future.

I am present to it all, thanking God for each and every moment.

10 thoughts on “Reflections As A Son Graduates

    • Please forgive my loooonnnngggg silence. After discovering that there is life after the graduation of my first born child! my computer went on the fritz and finally is in the shop. Thank you, though, for rejoicing with me!

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  1. Oh Colleen, thank you for sharing all the photos. What a great and proud moment it must be for you and your family. We’ll keep praying for Jacob as he will move into the next chapter of his life. Much love.

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  2. I rejoice with you, my friend, as you embrace this moment and incredible time! And indeed, what a gift this son of yours will be to the world. 🙂

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  3. Great photos Colleen! Thanks for letting us share in the moments with you. You’ve been with your son to help write the first few chapters of his life and now as he starts his own life he won’t forget about you mom. He’ll be right there with you writing his own story and will take with him all he has learned along the way, and I am sure will not depart from all that you have taught him. Congratulations on a job well done!

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    • I love how you worded this Tony. I’m so honored to get to watch him write his story. It’s going to be a good one! Thank you for always lifting me with your encouragement. And please forgive me for taking so long to reply – I’m hoping my computer will make a full recovery and I’ll be back in the saddle soon!

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  4. Thank you for sharing those beautiful photos, beautiful thoughts and beautiful reflections on this season. You reminded me that I need to soak up these moments with my kids even while they are so young because it goes by so fast. It feels like yesterday that you were pushing Jacob around in a stroller on campus….where does the time go? But you are right, the BIG world is going to be a brighter place with him out in it!!!

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    • Yes, people always warned me how fast it goes. And they were right. I’m glad I listened and tried to savor it all is it went. Still, it went too fast!! But I’m savoring this new season with the new aspects of my friendship with Jacob. I’m a blessed mom! Love to you Emily, and your beautiful little ones!

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